It is at certain intervals of life that we tend to take a step back an assess our progress. Sometimes during the reflection process we come across different realizations; choices we have made that have put us on the track to where we are today. Whilst shuffling through these past accomplishments and failures, we can’t help but compare our past triumphs and losses to where we are in this very moment.
Comparison tends to be a tactic our mind utilizes in order to affirm our current beliefs. Without outsider support of our own personal choices, the weight falls on our own shoulders; to assess, analyze, and make changes if necessary. At times we may feel that this assessment process of what our own lives should look like, is too much to take on, so we seek out external affirmation for our past choices. We can spew out our problems like shiny daggers, piercing the armor of those we chose to confide in, only to find that we are still left with our own assessment of the life we created, and the life we lead. Our confidants in armor may give us a small word of advice, or they may attempt to tell us exactly “how” we should lead our lives. Whatever advice we receive, good or bad, will always lead us back to the fact of the matter, which is; us comparing and attaching ourselves to our past performances.
How do I stop my mind from comparing my past performances to my current life?
- PPE (Paramount Personal Effort)
This tactic is one I like to employ when I feel as though all I’m able to do is reflect. I may become absolutely futile during these times of reflection; reading through old journals, looking through my old artwork, re-assessing old relationships, wondering why something didn’t work out like I wanted it too, angrily remembering the money I spent on this or that, the list can go on for as long as you allow it too.
There is a saying I’m sure most of you are aware of which goes something like, “don’t let your past dictate your future.” If we didn’t like how something went in the past, and are constantly thinking about it and giving it attention, we are feeding those past performances; allowing them to flourish in our lives over and over again. If you picture a house-plant attempting to grow, and you’ve tested many different plant foods, lighting, and watering intervals, you probably know which method works best. Why would you continue on with a method that you know is proven to kill your plant? It is through applying paramount personal effort, that we can begin to create and envision the best possible outcome for our lives, trot on new pathways, and open new doors.
- Listing & goal setting
The process of listing and goal setting can be very therapeutic. Through this process we are able to lay out the groundwork for exactly what we want our lives to look like. Do not compare anything during this process, and only allow your mind to think of fruitful things that bring you pure joy. A list of mine may look like the following:
If we keep re-assessing what went wrong in our past, we will keep cloning those experiences into our future. Therefore it is paramount to stay focused on the present moment, always entertaining the vision of hope we hold for ourselves.
It can also be helpful to go through your list and place stars next to the 3 most important goals you have for yourself.
When you wake up each morning, instead of re-enlisting those past doubts and sending em’ off, affirm the hopes that you have for your present moment, as well as your future.